Discouraged on the Road? Acknowledging Incremental Progress
Consistency has been the word around social media and YouTube lately. But what do you do when you feel as though you’ve been consistent and you don’t see quite the payoff for your work that you want to see?
This can look like seeing slow movement on paying off your loans, slow movement on losing weight or gaining health, slow movement on growing a business. Discouragement can come at nearly any time.
Sometimes perseverance feels like walking with cement blocks on for shoes. One step in front of the other, but much slower than you wish.
Recognizing discouragement when it comes, and fighting it, is the first step.
Often we have feelings that are just with us – we don’t identify or acknowledge those feelings, but they hover around us like ghosts. Acknowledging the truth, once again, proves to be central.
Discouragement, broken down into its parts of language, literally means to take your heart away. Discourage (v.) mid-15c., discoragen, "deprive of or cause to lose courage," from Old French descoragier "dishearten" (Modern French décourager), from des- "away" (see dis-) + coragier, from corage "spirit."
We can become dispirited and discouraged when the tangible rewards we expected do not come as fast as we would like. Or equally as discouraging and bad, we can compare our progress with someone else’s.
Comparing myself to others as they work to establish financial stability as a solo practitioner is one of my great temptations. I see how others have created a thriving practice and wonder if I’m just too far behind. Perhaps you also look at others and hear about their wins – and immediately feel inferior.
Specific Steps to Overcome Discouragement
So how do we truthfully encourage ourselves and one another?
1) Recognize and take account of what you have done.
Perhaps this is zooming out on your goal and seeing what you have accomplished. Let’s use paying off credit card debt as the example. If you have 3 cards with a total of $30,000 in debt, and you’re paying off the smallest one – let’s say, one with $8,000 originally on it. If you’ve paid $5,000 of it off, and you’re looking at the $30,000 total you might feel deeply discouraged. But if you only look at the initial goal ($8,000), realizing that you’re 63% the way there can give you the small encouragement that you need to make another small, strong step forward. Taking time to truthfully celebrate even small wins can push off discouragement.
2) Remind yourself why you’re doing this.
I can become downcast when I forget the reason I’m pursuing the goal. My goal planner has me write down 3-4 reasons why I want to pursue the goal. One of the best ways for me to overcome discouragement is to re-read those reasons. Each week I re-read the ‘Why’ I’ve written for each goal. And often I add to it or alter the ‘Why’ to be more powerful and inspiring to me.
3) Reframe the Moment
Sometimes, as I mentioned in a previous post, we’re given times to slog through in order to grow. Continuing forward when we just don’t feel like it, or when we doubt that it’s getting us where we want to go, is the process of growth. Growing is hard work (ask any child who has growing pains at night!) As adults, sometimes we forget it. We need to ponder this struggle might be an opportunity, and not only a challenge to endure.
A concluding encouragement:
One beautiful analogy is in Pilgrims progress, by John Bunyan. In the story, the main protagonist, Christian, with his companion, Hopeful, are captured by Giant despair and imprisoned, later in on the path to the Celestial City. He struggles with doubt and feels trapped in his mind and spirit, and falls into a deep depression.
The turning point comes when he remembers the Key of Promise. What promises can you depend on? I depend on the promise that if I am faithful with small things, I will become stronger in my behavior and habist; and the hard will become easy. How about you?
Have you started toward a goal and feel discouraged? Need a hopeful word, or a reminder of a promise that is the key to moving forward with hope? Contact me for a consultation.
